It started yesterday afternoon and has yet to cease. I have no idea what I want or want to do but I cannot shake this feeling – this urge – to want and to want to do. But with no answers or even ideas (other than shopping, and really, at 8 months pregnant? What is the point?), I sit here feeling stuck.
My darling husband suggested last night that maybe I should clean. Did he not get the memo about being 8 months pregnant? When I gave him the raised, incredulous eyebrow look, he quickly recanted and said that he meant, “you know – nesting stuff.” OK. Nesting I could probably get behind, but I’ve kind of already done a lot of that with the whole painting the basement, organizing the kitchen cupboards, and going through the storage containers to find newborn gear. And really, after getting through the first two weeks of Ben being back to teaching, I’m a little bit sick of the house. Even now he is at the high school football game while Harrison sleeps soundly in the room next to me, which is quiet and peaceful, but the fact remains that it’s just me and the dogs and the house and this extreme sense of not knowing what to do.
I haven’t hit the ready-to-be-done-with-being-pregnant wall quite yet and that is a good thing seeing as I have 7ish weeks left to go. So if I know it isn’t that, then perhaps it has a bit to do with knowing that we’ve hit the so close, yet so far away stage of the pregnancy. I cannot begin to fathom what life will be like when BWNo.2 arrives, but I seem to be itching to get there (don’t worry, Mom. I’m not actually itching!). That, or I just really want to go shopping.