Double Standard, Baby

Poor Mr. Harrison. There are just certain things in life that are far more acceptable and cute when done by babies rather than by toddlers. 

Take for instance the act of kicking. Seeing as we grow very wiggly and very active babies, Raegan kicks All. The. Time. She kicks her feet while sitting in her car seat or standing in her ExerSaucer. She sometimes manages to kick while she is nursing! And she really goes to town when she is on her belly on the floor. Sometimes she goes into Super Baby mode where all four limbs are off the ground and both legs are moving so fast, it is as if she is Belly Running. Yes, I think we’ve just coined a new term in Baby Development. Let’s add that to the survey at the doctor’s office!
             Question: Does your baby pick up her legs and let her feet fly back and forth furiously, as if running, while on her belly?
             Answer: Yes! Yes, she does! Score!

So yes, in Little Miss, we celebrate kicking. It is cute. “Yay, You! You’re kicking” we say. Or we commentate: “Kick! Kick! Kick!” in very happy, sing-songy voices.

Imagine Harrison’s confusion, then, when he kicks and gets reprimanded for such. But the truth of the matter is, I do not like it when he kicks. At the table it is annoying. I don’t need the constant banging while trying to inhale my food, thanks. And when I’m changing his diaper, it is painful. I cannot even tell you how many bruises I’ve had on my arms and legs these last few months because he is squirming/kicking during diaper changes. And while I go back and forth on “he should know better” (yes, I know, I know. You aren’t supposed to say that to your kids. I get it.), I really do think that it doesn’t help that Raegan gets to kick but he does/should not.

Take another example: blowing raspberries/bubbles and/or spitting. Again, when she does it, it is cute and innocent enough (except when she was blowing bubbles with the medicine I was trying to give her. That was NOT cute!). But when he spits, I sometimes get so mad, I could spit!

Same thing goes for screaming and crying. Thankfully this doesn’t happen often, but there have been several occasions when Raegan has been upset, so Harrison decides to chime in with his own pseudo screams or cries. Not sure if he’s trying to get attention or drown her out or both, but ugh. Fake screams and cries are just as bad and loud as the real ones, so I’ll take neither, thanks! But how do you explain that she’s a baby and cannot help it? Again, I am reminded of the conversation I’ve had with several friends that if I didn’t have a second baby, I would still be looking at my first as just that – a baby. But since I do have two, I expect the older one to behave in ways that, because of his actual age, probably aren’t realistic most days. Comprehending and controlling behaviors like this would be one such example.

The final double standard that I see between my children centers, again, on the mouth. Harrison sees Raegan putting everything and anything in her mouth and chewing on it like crazy, so every now and then, he tests the waters to see what he can get away with gumming or chomping. The answer is, not much, if I can help it. So again, the baby gets to bite but biting is the biggest NO-NO for HD.

*Sigh* No wonder we go around and around some days on what constitutes as “OK” behavior and what it means to be “nice”….he really must be wondering why OK and nice for Raegge are not the same for him. I try to tell him that babies do those things, but he is a big boy, so he should not, but I think I’ve got to come up with something a little more creative. Because apparently, being a big boy suddenly doesn’t seem so glamorous when it means you don’t get to do all the really fun stuff. Trust me, kiddo; I get it. Being a big kid (and an adult for that matter) comes with some pretty un-fun (not a word, I know) expectations sometimes! But try explaining that to a toddler!


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