For the last four weeks, the kids and I have walked Harrison to school every morning (minus one, when Daddy did it). We meet up with friends along the way at the “walking spot” and then move as one big happy (and some days quite rambunctious) herd to the school where we get the kids to their respective lines to wait for the start of day.
While some of my friends have kiddos who always want them close as they stand in line, Harrison has been content 9/10 to run ahead, hop in line, and wait. I always go over (once I catch up) to give him a hug and a smooch – because I know my years (days?!) of him being OK with me doing that in front of his classmates and friends are way numbered – but then that’s it. I go back over to where the stroller is parked and we wait and hang out until his class goes in, but rarely does he even turn to wave at me, much less wave me back over for another check-in.
So imagine my surprise this morning when HD suddenly had small tears in his eyes as we loaded up in the van to do our very first “drop off” morning (thank you cool and drizzly and windy weather). I had no idea he would be bothered by the idea of my not being there as he waited in line, but when I questioned him about why he was upset, sure enough – that was it!
Was it simply the change in routine? Trust me, this mama had some anxiety about doing the first ever drive-by-drop because all those cars! All those people! (it was totally, fine, by the way – no one even honked at me), so maybe my big first grader was feeding off my worried energy a bit. And/or/but maybe he really does like the fact that we’ve been there every morning, even if it has been at a distance, because just the sight of us – should he needs it – is enough.
All I do know is that my heart is forever walking around with him (and his sibs) and today I am hoping his sweet heart is just as brave and big as it seemed when he jumped out of the car and took off at a run to get around to the playground and his line. And that the magic of the kissing hand really holds.
It just goes to show, you never know what seemingly small things you might be doing as a parent that are ultimately big and meaningful to your kiddos. ❤
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